Throughout the years from friends and family members I’ve been introduced as Rick’s oldest friend.  We both know that’s untrue.  It’s always been him and his dog.  Through our childhoods and eventually through the decades.  We don’t know where the dog came from, it’s always been there and undyingly loyal.

The first recorded evidence we have of the dog is a picture of Rick as a baby.  It’s licking his face and he’s laughing in the baby carrier on the floor.  He’s in the background of the shot, the main focus being on his parents.  It’s a bit of a mystery in his family because no one owned the dog, had seen it come in, seen it with Rick or had any idea about where it came from.  It was a more corporeal form of those shadows and strange lights on pictures that people assume are ghosts.  Eventually, the photograph was just another point in time and the mystery a far forgotten detail like what room it was taken in or the time.

The first time I met the dog was when we were in his room playing video games.  It appeared on the bed behind us and barked to let us know it was here.  I jumped having been heavily involved in winning against Rick.  

“Hang on,” Rick said.

He went into his closet and got out a bowl and some dog kibble.  He poured it into the bowl and the dog hungrily ate it. When he was done, he filled the bowl with water from the bathroom.  The dog lapped it up then barked at him until he picked up the dog and pet him.  

“Where did that dog come from?” I asked him.

“He just comes around every now and then, the last time I saw him, he was under my table looking for food,” Rick said.  “Want to pet him?”

“Yeah, but where did he come from?”

“I don’t know, he just kind of shows up.”

“Out of what?  Nowhere?”

“I guess.  I never really thought about it.”

“How long has this been going on for?”

“I don’t know, like my whole life?”
“Why didn’t you tell me about this?”

“I thought you would think I’m weird.”

“Dude, just no, don’t worry about it.  But this is freaking me out.”

The dog leapt off his lap after this and then turned to look at us.  I remember it’s brown/gray coat and wagging tail.  It was one of those small long haired dogs.  A terrier or a yorky.  We didn’t find out until years later.  I still can’t remember the answer.  But I’ll never forget how it barked and then disappeared into the nothingness from whence it came. 

“What the hell?” I yelled again.

“Dude, calm down,” Rick said.

“A dog just appeared and disappeared in front of my eyes.  Why should I calm down?”

“Look, the dog’s doing his own thing, his timeline intersects with mine at random intervals and that’s about it.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I figured that if this was going to keep happening I should read up on theories about time and space.  Y’know cause this is super interesting!”

“Get to the point now!”

“Okay, so for us time moves in a straight line.  From point A of our births to point B, our deaths and we can’t really get out of it.  This dog though exists outside of all that.  He keeps coming in and out of my life, kind of like his time line is more of a squiggle like a bunch of hills.”

“You say that this is all perfectly normal!”

“For me, it is.”

“Do your parents know?”

“No, they’ve seen the dog around and seen me interact with it but they’ve always figured it was someone else’s or a stray.”
“I guess it is kind of a stray, I mean, it’s not like it belongs to anyone.”

“It belongs to me.  It’s my dog.”

“Does it have a name?”

“A name?  No, I was never around it long enough to think of one.”

“You’ve had fifteen years of interaction with this dog and never gave it a name?  You’re a shitty owner.”

“Fine, then how about Spot?”

“That dog didn’t have spots.”

“Rover?”

“Be more creative.”

“Dogthulu?”

“That thing is definitely not a Dogthulu.”

“Ice Cream Sandwich?”

“Let’s go with that.  That’s a good name.  You know what you should do?  Next time you see it, put a collar on it.  Then we could see if you’re also encountering that dog in a linear fashion.”

“That’s a good idea!”

“I think my brain is coming down from the shock.  Let’s play some more and you can tell me about when and where this dog has appeared.”

Rick seemed relieved.  I wasn’t but what mattered was that he was.  I listened as he listed encounter after encounter with the dog.  When he was picked on by Jason in the fifth grade, the dog found him crying and licked his scratched knee then stayed with him until he stopped.  Playing fetch after school waiting for his mom.  Just randomly appearing and him trying to find food for it.  I noticed a pattern that maybe he didn’t, that the dog appeared when he was alone or hurt.  Maybe the dog had a kind of intelligence to it.  

I was Rick’s friend through and through.  You don’t find a guy like him all that often.  Someone who will have your back through everything.  So, I didn’t go running to the hills when this dog started appearing while I was there.  It did make me curious that it would reveal itself so openly to me.  Maybe it trusted me?  The idea that it was smart enough to have the capability to selectively trust was growing inside of me.

The next time we saw it was in the movies.  It appeared on Rick’s lap and barked.  Someone shushed us probably thinking that we were a pair of smart aleck teenagers, which honestly we were.  Rick was prepared though he quickly put a collar on the dog that he had been carrying around since I told him about it.  The dog seemed appreciative and licked his face.  We didn’t see the person to our right get up and leave.  We did notice when the usher came to talk to us about the dog that wasn’t there anymore.  It was a close call that made us laugh uncontrollably.

The collar was a revelation in Rick and the dog’s relationship.  The relationship had actually expanded to Rick’s future and past selves as well.  Notes were tucked into the dog’s collar and they were seemingly unharmed in whatever dimension or what have you the dog traveled through to get back to Rick.  They ranged from advice written in pen or typed on a computer to little notes from his past selves saying hi written in crayon.  Rick got a bloody nose for about four hours after we put the collar on.  He told me that new memories were appearing in his head.  I stayed with him, wondering if I had somehow altered my friend’s past and he was going to die or the world would crack in two.  We took it as a lesson that we shouldn’t be meddling too much.  Things worked out as you can tell, the world kept spinning and time seemed more or less stable.  

It wasn’t all fun, there were things that worried us, like the day the dog came running to us.  It’s fur singed and it’s little heart beating and it wimpering.  Rick took it to the vet and she said that the dog seemed to have come from a fire.  That there was soot to be vacuumed out of its lungs.  Rick listened to this news looking grim.  The dog would be fine though, it was soon back to normal.  Jumping around and licking his face. Rick seemed happy about this but it left me with a cold chill down my back.  Wondering if the dog had run from my best friend’s death by fire to come back to him in the past.  I didn’t want to talk to Rick about it though. In retrospect I realize that I may have done more harm than good.

The years went on, the dog appeared and disappeared at varying intervals and for different periods of time.  At certain points we would have to hide him for days or weeks.  We began to wonder how old the dog was.  We figured the dog to be about three or so.  

Eventually, the dog appeared with a leash attached to the collar that had a note tucked into it.  The note read simply: Take him for a walk in the park.  I know you have time.  It was signed by him from some years in the future.  

Rick later told me that the day was so nice that he couldn’t help but want to.  They walked through the park slowly, Rick wondering why his future self had sent him there.  He was distracted by wondering if he should go faster or slower.  Then according to him the most beautiful woman he had ever met approached him, attracted to Ice Cream Sandwich who was excited to meet her.  They chatted for a long time.  They had their first date later that night.  

Seeing Catherine and Rick together made me happier than anything I had experienced up to that point.  It was the same for him when I met Terry.  Rick was engaged first with me following shortly after.  Ice Cream Sandwich made an appearance at both weddings wearing a bow tie that Rick’s future self had assumedly put on.  It made me wonder if he ever figured out a way to tell when the dog was going to show up in his own past.  The girls were surprised and at first disbelieving when we told them what was going on with Ice Cream Sandwich until he disappeared in front of them.  They were believers after that.  It was the first time we had ever let anyone in on our secret.  We had been perhaps overly solemn when asking them to talk leading Catherine to believe that Rick was going to tell her that the him and I running away together.  A real possibility for many of those that met us.  They were fine with the dog for the most part and they never told another soul.   

Catherine wanted a cat and with much wheedling eventually got Rick to say okay.  They got a little black cat that was sweet to everyone.  When Ice Cream Sandwich showed up nex, we found out the cat seemed to have some kind of sixth sense towards the dog.  She began to hiss and puff out her hair.  The dog appeared and she went after it.  Catherine grabbed the cat and Rick chased the dog.  When they had their respective pets there was a great more hissing and barking.  The downstairs neighbors began pounding on the ceiling with a broom.  The cat never got used to the dog.  But it did become our warning sign.  

It was a good life.  The years piled on in happy succession.  Terry and I loved and fought, we bought a house, talked about kids, decided against and then decided that we were ready.  Jim was born when I was thirty-three.  Ice Cream Sandwich showed up at the hospital when Rick came to visit.  A new theory popped into my head wondering if a future Rick was instead sending the dog where he showed up.  

The dog would make another appearance at the hospital when Catherine got cancer.  Those became the only times that the dog appeared without Rick present.  She would be at home, sobbing, the cat ignoring her and the yorky would appear.  He’d nuzzle her and she’d hold him and cry.  My theory began to seem more plausible though I began to wonder if the dog just knew somehow.  

She died on a Sunday.  I remember Rick calling me, sobbing, Terry and I rushed over there after dropping off Jim with my mother.  Jim left with the ambulance.  We fed the cat and went home.  

That Wednesday we had her service.  She had asked to be cremated and had her ashes let out over the ocean.  Rick asked to be alone when it was done.  We walked away, clad in our black clothes.  I remember looking over my shoulder at him.  He was standing on that cliff, silhouetted against the setting sun.  I remember seeing something moving and then the dog was by his side.  He didn’t reach down to pet it.  He just continued to stare out over the ocean.  The dog seemed content to just be there with him.  

Rick fell into depression.  I would come by and his house would be covered in bottles at times.  He would start projects and not finish them.  My wife did her best to make sure he got some food in him.  After a while, we stopped hearing from him.  We would go over and pound on his door whenever his car was in the driveway.  He would either be too drunk to answer or just not come to the door.  Jim was older then, he couldn’t understand why Rick wasn’t around.  I told him that Rick was going through a rough time and he needed some time alone.

A year passed in this way.  We hadn’t heard from Rick in three months.  Finally, I got a call from him.  He asked if I could come over by myself.  We were in the middle of dinner and my wife just mouthed the word “go” to me and I was on my way.  I drove faster than the law advised, I was almost stopped twice but pressed on.  My friend needed me, it would have been worth the ticket. 

When I got there, the house was clean, no bottles anywhere and Rick was dressed in his best suit.  The cat was lounging on the couch, uninterested in us.  He was standing and waiting for me when I got through the door.  He was thin, dirty looking, haggard and bearded.  His eyes were red and I wondered when the last time he had slept or ate was.  What day?  What week?    

“Hey, man, long time no see,” he said.

“Yeah, how you been?” I replied.

“Been not so great.”

“Here, why don’t we sit down and talk about it.”

“We talked a bunch about it already.”

“Yeah, but we can always talk some more.”

“No, I just wanted to bring you over here to say goodbye.”

“Goodbye?  What do you mean?”

Rick took a deep breath and let it out.  

“I can’t be here anymore.  Everything hurts too much.  I can’t be without Catherine,” he said.

“So, what you’re planning on killing yourself?” I asked him. 

The cat started to hiss and that’s when Ice Cream Sandwich appeared.  I looked at the dog who sat dutifully next to Rick.

“Take care of the cat and put everything in order if you could, please,” Rick said.  “You’re listed as my beneficiary.”

“Rick, c’mon man, you’re talking crazy.”

“I got to go.”

Before I could do anything, Rick picked up the dog.  Then they were gone.  I shouted at the moment of his disappearance but it just rang through the empty house.  I slumped to the ground.  My best friend was gone.  I sat for a long time on his couch staring at the walls.  Upon further inspection, he had left something akin to a suicide note relieving me of responsibility in his disappearance.  I hoped that it would be good enough for the police.  

I picked up the cat and found his carrier.  I closed down the house, turning off the lights and locking it up.  I climbed into my car and left his house for the last time.  I knew I would only be inside it again to sell it.  When I got home I told Terry what happened, the cat running around its new home and freaking out.  

“It makes sense doesn’t it?” she asked.  “How would I go on without you?”

I thought about that possibility, one that I refused to acknowledge at the back edges of my mind.  It twisted my stomach, a knot of despair and pain.  I didn’t have an easy way out now that Jim was here.  I’d die for her but I wouldn’t live for anyone else but him.  I held Terry for a long time.  When I let her go we went to bed.  The cat had found its way to Jim’s bed and had curled up with him.  They were best friends from that night on.  

I lay for a long time thinking about Rick and the dog.  My theory on whether or not it had been sent back by Rick to all those lonely moments in his life.  To ease his pain and share his joy.  Maybe it returned to him in some distant and unknown future.  Now the two of them relying on one another for emotional support.  A man’s best friend.

But there in the darkness, alone with my terrible thoughts I began to think about a new possibility.  That the sadness and pain had snapped Rick’s spirit in two and he had fallen to never rise again.  The dog licking at his face and nudging him with his nose to make him wake up.  Then disappearing into time and space to be reunited with his friend.  Perpetually running from the fate it knew to be coming.  Trying to be the kind of dog that his master would want to stay with.  Trying to get him to hold on.    

I fell asleep with these thoughts in my head.  Pressing my hand against my wife’s stomach.  Reassuring myself that she was still there.  

I’m older now and things have continued in much of the same vein.  A happy life interspersed with moments of terrible sadness and others of anger that we work our way through.  Terry and I are still together for what it’s worth.  I believe I make her happy and she does the same for me.  

Our son is becoming a man and a damn fine one if I do say so myself.  He gets into trouble at school sometimes but for all the right reasons.  He fights to solve a lot of his problems but those problems most of the time are kids picking on other kids.  He has a girlfriend who we like but are fearful that she’ll get into a family way but I believe that’s a normal parental concern.  I’ve told him about his uncle Rick.  About everything because I trust and love him.  He thought I was crazy until his mother confirmed what I was saying.  Then he just thought the both of us were crazy.  

We’re done camping now.  The three of us.  We’re walking back to the car and the sun’s setting.  I’m putting something in the car and not looking at it when I hear my son.

“Dad, do you know that guy?” he asks me.

I look up and see a man silhouetted again by the sun.  A black shape on orange.  He’s waving at me. I want to go to him.  I want to talk to him. But I fear the consequences and I stay still.  I see a small dog running up to him.  It yaps excitedly at his feet.  I see the man pick it up.  But he doesn’t disappear.  He simply walks away from us towards the sun.  

I feel the tears hit my shirt before I know that I’m crying.  My wife moves to my side and holds me.  She wants to be close to me because she thinks I’m sad but the smile on my face is bigger than any I’ve had there in a long time.  My son comes to my side as well and a put on hand on his shoulder.  

I think about best friends.  I think about a man.  I think about a dog.  I think about a love that is so strong that it transcends everything to come back to you.  I think about love that can’t be conquered by time, distance or death.  I think about what a wonderful life I have lived.  I live.  I will always live.