Recently there were set pictures released of the four actors who were coming together in the Beatles cinematic universe. Because that’s a thing that we need. Four movies about one band when almost every biopic nowadays can’t get away from the shadow that is Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox story. A movie that rips on every biopic trope, because there are just so many, with a joyful wink. Much like Pop Star, it was horrendously underrated and deserves to be among the annuls of Anchorman and Superbad for well know and overly quoted comedies.

I could go on about it but I wanted to bring attention to the recent set photos from the new Beatles biopic films. And these four low level drug dealers that are supposed to be the Beatles.

A friend of mine pointed out that they look like they’re all on Undercover Boss with how terrible their wigs are. Like John is going to show up in the canteen at Abby Road to find out what Ringo thinks about him.

“Did you hear that John made a really good forty-five minute film of his flaccid penis?”

And Ringo is just staring at him.

Anyway, that’s what they look like. So, to quote Jason Bateman from American Psycho: Let’s look at Walk Hard’s Beatles.

And there we have the difference. Despite looking like a bunch of dealers who have definitely laced my weed with meth as a joke, the four Dewey Cox Beatles still look nice and like they would be willing to help an old lady across the street without robbing her.

The BCU John Lennon looks particularly bad. The beard doesn’t have the same well maintained nature that Lennon’s did a that time. Actually I looked back at it and the Ringo is off. He looks like a regular Ringo that melted because of a magnifying glass. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to say that the men portraying them are ugly. It’s just the wigs and hair is just… bad.

I don’t know, this isn’t going to get me in the seat for it. I think I’ll hold out for the Smiths cinematic universe where we get a five minute montage of Morrissey cancelling shows over nothing and then getting disappointingly into far right politics.