I haven’t won the lottery so don’t try and kill me for my money. This post is about what I woul do if I won the lottery. Which is that I would go back to school and learn whatever the hell I felt like.

Psychology? Degree in that.

Art? I can fuck around with some paints for a year or two.

Culinary school? Let’s cut onions like we’re Julia Child(It’s the only scene I saw from Julie & Julia).

The thing is I’ve always wanted to be a private eye as well. I figure if I had won the lottery I would have the time to do the 400 hours it takes in NJ to get your private eye license. I had the thought that the degrees would make that job easier. It was then that I realized who I was really becoming: